Tuesday, July 26, 2011

French to Invade Monaco!

Well, okay, not really, but that is what would happen if the Editor-in-Chief of L'Express has his way. Christophe Barbier, rather upset that his paper is being sued by the Prince of Monaco demanded that France annex the principality (which was last done in the Revolution when the country was occupied by republican troops and the palace plundered). Michel Roger, Monegasque Minister of State (effectively the PM) was not amused by the demand, calling it "surrealist". Elements in France have also objected to the "neo-colonialist" ranting of Barbier who really has no one to blame but himself for his paper sinking to the level of yellow journalism. As usual, Barbier has resorted to the usual republican talking points, saying that Monaco needs to join the "modern" world by being incorporated into France. Yes, just keep telling yourself that Mr. Republican, Monaco is so backward and out-of-date by still being ruled by a Prince even though they have lower taxes, greater per capita wealth, virtually no crime and absolutely no un-employment. Yes, those Monegasque sure are suffering compared to the prosperity of the French Fifth Republic. This is funny.

Can't you just see the headlines now?

France to Invade Monaco: At last a War They are Confident They can win!
French Forces Occupy Monaco: Will it be the Guillotine for the Grimaldis?
Paris - Monte Carlo Dispute to be Settled by Game of 21
Monaco Launches Preemptive Strike: Ten soldiers sent to reoccupy Menton & Roquebrune!
France to Annex Monaco: Casiraghi Trio man the canon at Ft Antoine
Prince Albert Invokes Protectorate Treaty: Demands French troops defend Monaco from the French!
France and Monaco at War: Princess Stephanie to lead army of elephants over the alps
Monaco Announces Counter-Annexation of France: Princess Charlene picking out drapes for Versailles
French Move Against Monaco: Charlotte Casiraghi dons bikini to distract enemy soldiers
France Seeks NATO Support Against Monaco: Upon learning that Princess Caroline was in town.
Attack on the Port of Marseilles: Monaco Swim Team believed to be responsible

It's just funny, I could go on and on...

2 comments:

  1. heheheheheehehehhehehehe (wanted to use the hahas but someone already did). funny. like the elephants.

    ReplyDelete

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